


Spy Games (and Selfies)

by Cinder



Category: Selfie (TV)
Genre: F/M, spy AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-08
Updated: 2014-11-08
Packaged: 2018-02-24 13:48:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2583608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinder/pseuds/Cinder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you realize you’re in love with your best friend just by looking at her one day. Other times, it takes a psychopath dangling her out of a window to make you realize it. </p><p>Henry/Eliza Spy AU. Because, well, why not?</p><p>*</p><p>Written for Tumblr user avenue29, who requested a fic detailing the moment Henry realizes he's in love with Eliza. I might have taken the "falling" part too literally.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spy Games (and Selfies)

“I cannot believe you’re blaming me for this.” Eliza’s voice sounds outraged, but Henry’s having a little trouble focusing on it, still shifting around in his seat to see if all of his knives were taken. 

“Well who else am I supposed to blame?” He hisses back at her. 

“Maybe the guy who actually ambushed us and ruined our mission?” Eliza says, pinching his hands. He tries to yank his hands out of hers, but they’re tied back to back, so he doesn’t really have anywhere else for his hands to go. 

“He was your boyfriend.” Henry says. “You are the seduction expert, how in the hell did you not realize you were sleeping with a double agent for five months?”

“You’re the strategic expert, how come you didn’t realize the party was a trap?” 

“I was...” Truthfully, his attention had been diverted by Eliza dancing with the target, whose hands were getting just a little too low below the waist. True, she was trained for this sort of thing, but Henry still didn’t like it. Each mission was getting harder, watching Eliza flirt with targets, who took the opportunity to rub their dirty hands all over her. Henry was starting to take extra pleasure in subduing them once Eliza was finished extracting all the information she needed. 

“Ha.” Eliza says, sensing she’s won.

Henry rolls his eyes at Eliza gloating, even now. He opens his mouth to reply, but then stops when he feels her wiggling against the ropes. 

“What are you doing?” Henry feels his mouth go dry. He closes his eyes and forces himself to think back to the fifty manuals Saperstein gave them when they started going out on missions. He’s attempting to recount the article on being captured when Eliza twists even more against the ropes.

“Eliza?” He tries to force himself back to the manuals, but his mind is going to other places. Places where Eliza and ropes are a starring feature and...

“I’m looking for my cell phone.” Eliza says.

“Your cell phone?” If he was able to, Henry would bury his face in his hands. They’re tied up, their weapons and mics are gone, Henry doesn't even know what country they’re in, and Eliza’s looking for her damn cell phone? 

“We could contact Saperstein.” Eliza says. 

Henry supposes that’s a good idea. However, he’s almost positive it was taken away when they were searched. Eliza’s got a reputation around the office with her phone. Not only does she use it to instagram and tweet, but it’s her most valuable weapon. He heard that she once killed a crossbow wielding assassin with nothing but her cell phone. Charmonique also mentioned that Eliza once used Facebook to stop a bomb from going off, but Henry’s not sure he believes that one.

Eliza’s still struggling with the ropes when the door opens and Freddy walks in. Henry narrows his eyes. He’s never trusted this guy from the start, especially when Freddy started sleeping with Eliza. Although she was won over by him, Henry couldn’t help but feel that Freddy’s attentions didn’t seem pure. 

“Well, duh.” Eliza had said once, when Henry had mentioned it to her. “Nothing we do is pure.” She wiggled her eyebrows at him, and Henry had felt his stomach immediately churn. He had dropped the subject after that.

Now Freddy’s true colors have been revealed, and if they weren’t in such a bad position, Henry would be gloating. But right now Freddy’s staring at them, twisting a knife in his hands like an amateur James Bond villain. 

As it is, Henry thinks he’ll wait until later. 

“Freddy!” Eliza’s tone is sweet and syrupy. From her voice alone, it sounds like all three of them should be back in the office, drinking coffee. “Freddy, what’s going on?” She pauses and then lowers her voice. “Was the sex that bad?”

“Eliza.” Henry knocks her shoulder with his, trying to make her shut up. “Freddy, I don’t know why you’re doing this and I really don’t care. But I’m sure that by now Saperstein knows we’re gone and has raised the alarm, so why don’t you just let us go? If you hurry, you can be out of the country before Sam gets here.” 

Freddy snorts. “Saperstein’s an idiot. Thanks to a report I filed, he thinks all three of us are on a covert mission and won’t be back for a while.” Then Freddy turns to Eliza. “And actually Eliza, the sex was fantastic.” 

Henry wishes he were anywhere but here right now, and not just because there’s a knife blade two inches from his face. 

“What?” Freddy turns to Henry, who forces his features into a mask of indifference. “You don’t want to hear about Eliza and me?” Henry feels Eliza stiffen in her seat. 

“Because let me tell you, this girl is wild.” Freddy says, chuckling. He grabs the back of Eliza’s seat and drags it until she’s facing Henry. “You would not believe what she’s into...”

“Is this really relevant?” Henry asks. “Aren’t you supposed to be asking us for codes or safe house locations or something?”

“Yeah, you’ve got a point.” Freddy says, and walks over to Eliza. Henry feels his stomach drop.

“Henry, don’t tell him anything.” Eliza says calmly. 

“Oh that’s right.” Freddy says, looking from Eliza to Henry. “You two are friends, aren’t you? Maybe even besties?” He says, in a fair imitation of Eliza’s voice. “Tell me, Henry, do you want to see your bestie get a few new scars tonight?”

And then brings the knife against Eliza’s neck. 

“You don’t want to do this.” Henry says, trying to focus on Eliza.

“You really do not divert from the manuel, do you?” Freddy smirks, brushing the knife up and down Eliza’s neck. She’s tense, but Henry can tell she’s trying to keep calm. “That’s why Saperstein thought you two would be such a good little pair.”

Henry can feel his resolve breaking, watching Eliza try to keep strong against her panic.

“Freddy,” Eliza says, “I’ve got to tell you something.” 

Both men look at her.

“Eliza...” Henry can’t tell if he wants her to talk or if he wants her to not say anything. His loyalty should be to Saperstein, but he can’t stand looking at that damn knife near Eliza’s face anymore. 

Eliza takes a deep breath before looking up at Freddy. “The sex wasn’t really that good for me,” she says. 

Freddy slaps her, and Henry feels himself fighting to get out of the chair. 

“I’m fine.” Eliza says, ignoring Freddy and looking at Henry. Her right cheek is already swelling and blood is trickling from her nose.

“And who,” Freddy says, his voice dangerously low, “would be a better at sex?” He turns towards Henry and points his knife. “Him?”

“Him?” Eliza says, surprised.

“Me?” Henry kind of wishes everyone didn’t sound so surprised, including himself. 

“I’ve seen the way you two are always giggling together. You’re in his office every day, he’s stops by your desk every day, Saperstein can’t stop gushing about the adorable babies you two are going to have.”

“Oh dear God.” Henry murmurs.

“He’s already named himself the godfather.”

“That guy needs to get a hobby.” Eliza mutters.

“Truthfully, I kind of thought you were cheating on me with him anyway.” Freddy says. “If I hadn’t been about to sell you out I would have been hurt.” 

“Well that worked out for everyone.” Henry comments drily. 

“Wait, you thought I was cheating on you? Are you kidding me?!” Eliza starts tugging at her ropes, and Henry once again rolls his eyes.

“Out of everything, this you get upset about?”

“Of course I thought you were cheating on me,” Freddy says, ignoring Henry, “you’re the office slut.” 

“Leave her alone!” Now it’s Henry’s turn to tug at the ropes. 

“I’m a seduction expert you dick! It’s different!” Eliza yells, tears welling up in her eyes. “And so what if I like sex? I have a stressful job, and after disemboweling six or seven assassins it’s nice to have a stress release. And...” she lowers her eyes, and Henry can see the hurt girl that she had once been rising up again, “...and I thought I might actually like you enough to be in a relationship with you. But you were just using me.”

“Yep.” Freddie says, and then something occurs to him. “Wait a second, you really weren’t sleeping with Henry?”

Eliza shakes her head and Freddy bursts into mocking laughter. “You mean that you didn’t notice all those puppy eyed looks he kept giving you?”

Henry really hopes that Freddy just stabs him and ends it all right here.

“I thought that was just his face.” Eliza says.

Really, anytime that Freddy wants to stab him would be fine with him.

“So you didn’t notice that your partner was in love with you?” Freddy says.

“I’m not in love with her,” Henry responses automatically, wanting this conversation to end. He notices the flash of hurt on Eliza’s face, but is distracted by Freddy walking back over to her.

“Ok then.” Freddy says. He raises the knife and Henry tenses, but Freddy only cuts Eliza free of the chair. He grabs her by her hair, knife at her throat. “Then you don’t mind if I do this?”

Before Henry can respond, Freddy kicks open the nearest window, and shoves Eliza out of it. 

Henry’s scream mixes with Eliza’s, and he realizes that he’s never going to see Eliza smile at him again and tease him about being old and teach him how to use Instagram properly and...and it’s only after a minute of blind, gut churning panic that Henry notices that Freddy’s got one hand still clenched on Eliza’s dress. Freddy pulls her up through the window and tosses her onto the floor.

Henry attempts to regulate his breathing back into a normal pattern, but it’s not working very well.

“That was so much fun.” Freddy says, looking from Henry to Eliza, who is by this point progressed to full blown sobbing. She’s curled up in a ball on the floor, face down. He leans down towards Eliza. “Henry still doesn’t seem too corporative. Wanna do it again?” 

The second Freddy’s face gets close to Eliza, her fist comes up to meet him. The first punch catches him by surprise and he staggers back, just in time for Eliza to reach into her dress and pull out her cell phone. Henry’s not exactly sure where she hid it, and he’s not sure he wants to know. 

Freddy smirks, staring at her. “Oh, what are you going to do with t-”

Eliza whips it at him, smashing his face with the screen. 

The rest is quick, and the phone is in good enough condition to call for backup, much to Eliza’s delight. 

“I mean,” she says, untying Henry, “it is so hard to keep replacing these things. I have to transfer all my contacts, and my music -” 

She’s cut off by Henry kissing her. 

“What?” She says, looking from Henry to the unconscious Freddy on the floor. “Didn’t you just say less than fifteen minutes ago that you didn’t have feelings for me?”

“That was to a psychopathic torturer who was willing to use whatever tools were at his disposal to get information out of us.” Henry says. He hesitates. “...Plus I didn’t really realize it myself until you were...” He looks down. “The window and... and I thought something had happened...”

“Ohhhhhh.” Eliza smirks, drawing Henry closer. “You thought I was gone forever, and all those words of love you would never get to whisper to me ran through your mind...” She says over-dramatically.

“I would use different wording, but yes.” Henry says, leaning into her touch. 

“Well then, I think we should do what James Bond does when he celebrates defeating a bad guy.” 

“Drink irresponsibly on a mission? Harm numerous civilians just to nab one criminal?”

“Have sex before the calvary shows up.”

“Oh.” Henry nods. “Ok, that might be...doable.” He winces. “Bad choice of words.”

“I want to a make a pun right now, but Charmonique’s the one piloting the rescue jet, so we’re going to have to hurry.” And she pulled him into another kiss.

James Bond, Henry thinks, might be onto something with this whole sex thing.


End file.
